Pray a little...

Excerpt from “It’s not about the bike” by Lance Armstrong, page 116.

I asked myself what I believed. I had never prayed a lot. I hoped a lot, I wished a lot, but I didn’t pray. I had developed a certain distrust for organized religion growing up, but I felt I had the capacity to be a spiritual person, and to hold some fervent beliefs. Quite simply, I believed I had a responsibility to be a good person, and that I meant fair, honest, hardworking, and honorable. If I did that, if I was good to my family, true to my friends, if I gave back to my community or to some cause, if I wasn’t a liar, a cheat, or a thief, then I believed that should be enough. At the end of the day, if there was indeed some Body or presence standing there to judge me, I hoped I would be judged on whether I had lived a true life, not on whether I believed in a certain book, or whether I’d been baptized. If there was indeed a God at the end of my days, I hoped he didn’t say, “But you were never a Christian, so you’re going the other way from heaven.” If so I was going to reply, “You know what? You’re right. Fine.”

In one paragraph this man has summed up the entire philosophy of a large number of people in this world. A lot of people question the benchmark against which it will be decided whether they should go to heaven or hell. A lot of people don’t care about heaven or hell! “You’ll be dead, how does it matter?”

In a nutshell, the one thing in common between all religions is that, if you do good to people you earn plus points. If you do bad, you earn negative points. In the end you need to have a positive balance. That easy enough to understand. What I don’t understand is how these same religions preach that by performing certain rituals you can undo all the bad you have done in life. How can you take back the harm you have inflicted on others by a ceremony? If there is a God that you need to please, and God is everything they say He is, then does performing these rituals to the letter get you off the hook? Isn’t it a bit like saying, I’ve been making a lot of withdrawals on my bank account these days. Let me do something to increase my balance. Then I can go about withdrawing money. That’s because the bank rule says that you need to have a certain minimum balance in the account.

Is that how life works? Like a bank account? Why do we need a group of priests scaring us into doing good? What happens to the people who go about doing horrid things and then at the end of the day just pray to absolve themselves of their sins and then repeat the cycle all over again? Why do good people need to be felt guilty about not praying?

I’ve taken to praying to God for awhile now. I believe in God because I’ve been blessed in so many ways that plain coincidence or luck just doesn’t cover it. I pray to God to thank Him for everything He has done for me not because it will ensure a place in Heaven for me.

I’m sure that if the entire concept of God and Heaven and Hell were taken away, people would still do good for society, that kindness will still persist. But then I guess all of it does have its utility. It might be the only thing keeping a lot of people in check. It might also be the reason why a lot of people turn good.

why should i?

It was my turn to get the car in our carpool. I was waiting outside to pick up my friend. He was late so he called me in. He went to get ready while I sat and chatted with his mother. She’s a pleasant lady, like all mothers, lovable and adorable. She was quick to list out why she thought her son was such a slob. Then she relented saying that all guys are like that. Girls are much better at helping around the house, she said.

In the car I told my friend what his mother said about him. He said what his mother had already told me, “Everyone is like that”.

That brings me to the larger question. Why do we always say that? “Everyone is a slob at home, so what’s the big deal if I am too?” or “Why should I work to score high when 50% qualifies you to the next level?” or at work “Why should I work hard if the boss’s pet gets promoted? “All these are the manifestations of the same thing. Why is it that we don’t want to work hard? Part of the answer lies in the fact that some people are just plain lazy. They are only looking for endorsements for their basic philosophy “work only as hard as you need to get by”. You can’t do much for such people except feeling glad that they are at least doing what they need to do to get by. Beyond that, you’d be surprised to find how many talented people with potential get disheartened from working hard. They are not lazy. They just give up after sometime. “What’s the point?” they say. We all go through such a phase. We want to do something but we realize that our efforts are not paying off. Why should we go on then?

They say the corporate world is full of cut throat competition. You work hard on a project, someone else takes the credit. You perform consistently but someone else gets the promotion. What do you do in such a juncture? Should you continue giving it your best shot, to the best of your capability? What’s the point?

The point is ‘you’. You work hard for ‘you’. You give it your best shot for ‘you’. What you learn from your experience is yours alone. Nobody can take that away from you. Working to the best of your potential is also working to your satisfaction. People run around looking for satisfaction and don’t find it. I guess they are too busy looking for it to work hard to achieve it.

another rhyme

if you only knew what i was going through
you'd realise why the skies are blue

its not about the money, the fame or fortune
its about failing at something you really wanted to do

dard-o-gham-o-azaab bhi seh gae kyun ye puchte ho
aab-e-chashm main dhul gai raah kyun ye puchte ho
jis manzil-e-maqsad par chal pade the ghar se
wo manzil hi hame chhod gai kyun ye puchte ho

azaab: anguish
aab-e-chashm: tears

life and human values

What sets us apart as a species is our intriguing curiosity. It is this curiosity which has developed us and made us so different from all the other species on earth. We lead our entire lives wondering and searching for answers. We hope to find it before we die. Find what you ask? Something that will help us understand life and our purpose here.

Biologists state that the purpose of life of every species is to reproduce and give birth to their young in order to propagate their kind. You are born, you grow up, you give birth and then you die. You’ve achieved your purpose in life. But does it hold true for humans too? I haven’t yet met a person whose aim is to give birth to a child. It is a part of life yes, but not the goal one’s entire life is headed toward.

What is life then? Why does it matter so much to us? What is the value of our life? And what do we mean by human values?

Twice in one’s life a person turns philosophical. Once when you are an adolescent and next when you turn past your prime. Once when your life is ahead of you and the other when you feel you’ve lived your life. Both these times you are scared. Either wondering what your life will be like or wondering whether you lived it right.

Having gone through those adolescent years recently, I empathize with those going through it now. I know what they are going through. I wish them well and leave them to their own devices. Why? Because that’s the best way of finding your own answers. It is every man’s quest. It’s a journey best made alone. Not until you experience it yourself can you understand the answers of the questions you seek. That is the philosophy of student-teacher relationship. Teacher epitomizes someone who has experienced life and its contradictions, someone who knows the answers. The student signifies the one looking for answers, for he does not understand what he sees or seeks in this world. But the teacher does not give the answers to the student. He sets tasks for the student to perform instead, because he understands that not until the student has gone through hardship and pitfalls will the student understand the meaning he seeks.

Indian philosophy states that it is the purpose of every human to find their ideal guru and for the guru to find their ideal disciple. I differ from this aspect of this philosophy. I say that every person lives their life in a dual role. At any given time they are both a guru and a disciple. As a disciple, a person seeks answers from those more experienced than them. As a guru they provide answers to those who haven’t experienced as much as they have. There is no one constant guru for everyone. At every stage of their lives people seek out different gurus. They learn from them and move ahead. Today I admire someone for their grit and determination. I learn from that person, he becomes my guru. I inculcate his virtues and move on. I in turn inspire another person with my virtues. But my guru remains my guru.

That is the purpose of our lives. To seek out virtues, to admire those that have them, to influence those that don’t. That is why our lives are important. We enrich lives around us and are enriched in turn. Every person sets out in their life in search of answers and finds them in the values of other humans. Such is the power of human values.

all it needs is music

chandni si chalakti hai niganho main, jaane kis asha ka intezaar hai
zarro se bikhre lamhe samet-te hain, hame un lamho se pyaar hai

ek aas main doobe rehte hai, ummeedon se sansain chalti hai
asha hai us muquaam ki jiske liye ham bekaraar hai

karte hain baatein is dil se, kaash koi sunne wala hota
ek jo samajhta tha hamein, wahi jaane kahan faraar hai

dil-e-hasarat hai kaif-asar ho jain kissi pe
Badamast hamein jo sambhale wahi gam-gusaar hai


kuch mangna chahte hai par rok lete hai dil ko
Rab ke saaye main pale hai,ab aur kiske haq-daar hai

unki baaton main kat-te hai din, har raat main intezaar hai
wo chahe bhool jaein hamein, hamein unke aane par aitbaar hai

yun rukhsat hue wo hamse, wapas bulain bhi to kaise
jis raah se jude the ham ab usi raah main diwaar hai

news and the media

BJB MP Babubhai Katara has been detained for trying to smuggle a woman and child on the passport of his wife. Incredible isn’t it? But then again if you have grown up watching action movies starring the likes of Sunny Deol and Ajay Devgun, where the bad guy is always a political figure, you aren’t really surprised. You must have already seen it somewhere in some movie or the other. What is incredible is how his lawyers claim that the MP had absolutely no idea what was going on. Now that’s incredible! The poor fellow has a grown woman and a teenage boy tagging along with him all the way to the airport lounge and he has no idea who’s behind the ghunghat! I’m guessing Mrs. Katara runs a really tight ship around the house.

Since we are watching all this on the TV news, have you noticed how many women journos we have these days? We have two women sitting at the studios, hosting the show talking to correspondents on site, who are also mostly women. That’s a trend no-one saw coming and a good one too. A word of advice to those committing or planning to commit crimes against women, “you’d better watch out or you might get swarmed by media persons who aren’t just excited about the scoop.”

Speaking of news channels and the media, who can miss the Ash-Abhishek wedding story these days? When we have such a gala event where all the big wigs of Bollywood are going to converge it does make for good entertainment. Everyone wants to know what the bride wore, what her sahelis wore, not to mention the groom and his friends. Nobody wants to miss a chance to criticize a faux pas especially so if it revolves around a celebrity. Here’s an idea to the movie producers around. Given the market we have for reality TV, why not have a group of professional videographers catching the amusing moments of the days leading up to the wedding and the wedding itself of course). You can get pointers from Mr. Hum Apke Hai kaun-Suraj Barjatia himself! Sell the video to a channel. You’d be sure to get all the sponsors you need. Now there’s a chance to actually make money on the wedding.

I have to add a word on American idol here. The very criticized Sanjay Malakar is finally out of the show. I was saying to myself the last few days, ‘all you need is to put an Indian on the show to reduce American Idol to Indian Idol.” Of course I don’t mean American Idol is a superior show than Indian Idol. How can you even think that?! All I mean is that what we have seen in the last two season’s of Indian Idol (with not so talented guys winning based on SMS votes) was happening in American Idol too. Almost. ;) But that makes you think. What do you think will happen in the next season of American Idol? Do you think the panel of three will refrain from bringing another Indian on the show fearing that he’ll be supported whole heartedly by the Indian community even if he isn’t that talented? Or do you think there will be hue and cry over talented people of Indian origin not being able to make it to the show because of this skepticism? Well whatever it is, one this is for sure. The Indian media will have a gala time reporting it.

Lastly. I offer my condolences to the people who lost their lives at Virginia Tech at the hands of Cho Seung Hui.